Thursday, April 14, 2011

I have become absolutely OBSESSED with food and calories this week.  Even more so than usual.  I've been refusing myself even a few extra calories a day, so I've been going to bed hungry (which sucks because then it takes me forever to fall asleep since I just lie there and imagine eating all kinds of delicious food).  Last night I even dreamed about a beautifully tasty little cupcake.  It was literally the center of my dream lol.

Ahh I can't wait until I get down to my goal so that I can start eating "normally" again.  Since I've been limiting myself to 300 calories a day this week, eating 1000 would feel like SO much.  My 300 calorie dinners have actually seemed like "real" meals anyways.  Yesterday I had an entire cucumber avocado roll for only 300 calories, today and the other day I had 3 small slices of vegan pizza.  I know I would be completely satiated with 1000, having eaten probably 2 meals and like 3 snacks a day to get to the full 1000 calories.  I'm actually looking forward to getting to the 2468 diet because the 600 and 800 days will be sooo nice lol.

That reminds me, I hate that I've been trying to get through my days as quickly as possible.  I've been working until around 6pm everyday, and I don't allow myself to eat until then.  I then focus on my homework as much as possible while I slowly eat my dinner so that it lasts for most of the night (to avoid any late-night snacking).  Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure I'll be like this until I get to my weight goal.  Since I've been obsessed with food, I need the homework to distract me and to stay out all day to keep me from eating.  Ugh why can't I lose faster lol! --Actually, what I should say is why did I ever let myself get so HUGE?!?!? That's the real problem here...

No comments:

Post a Comment